How IFS helps rebuild safety, identity, and trust
There are several types of trauma therapy that address the deep and multifaceted nature of Complex PTSD (CPTSD). One therapeutic approach called Internal Family Systems (IFS) can be incredibly effective. I’ll be honest, when my therapist started telling me about it, I didn’t believe in the “mumbo jumbo,” but I was literally rock bottom and had tried it all before. I also have incredible trust in my therapist. I had difficulty finding a therapist and felt like the universe was really looking out for me, especially regarding this modality. My therapist happened to have a training on IFS a few weeks after my diagnosis. She had been on a waiting list for two years. It just felt like kismet, so I decided why not. In this post, we’ll explore how IFS therapy can help in the trauma healing process, even if it seems bizarre.
What is Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy?
Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a therapeutic approach developed by Dr. Richard C. Schwartz. IFS suggests that the mind is made up of multiple sub-personalities or “parts,” each with its own perspective and emotions. These parts can be functional, protective, or wounded. Think about when you have a thought that you’re fat or some other disparaging thing, about YOURSELF. That is a part of you. You aren’t born thinking negative thoughts about yourself. That negative self-talk inside your head came from somewhere, and your mind developed a response and reaction.
My brain goes non-stop from the moment I wake up until I fall asleep. I can have negative self-talk, but most of my internal chatter tends to be productivity-based. I was told a lot in adult life that I work harder than everyone. But I think it’s really, I don’t ever stop. If there’s a problem, I’ll keep working on it, even if just in my brain, until there is a solution. I didn’t know that wasn’t normal until October 2023, when one of my direct reports asked if I ever stopped thinking and told me it wasn’t normal. I just didn’t know it was connected to trauma. The goal of IFS therapy is to heal those wounded parts that developed and create balance within the system, which will help reduce (maybe cut out) the constant chatter.
How IFS Works
- Identifying Parts: In IFS, the therapist helps the individual identify the different parts of themselves. These parts might include a “child part” that carries the trauma, a “protector part” that tries to shield the individual from further harm, and a “manager part” that strives to keep everything under control.
- Building Self-Leadership: The core of IFS is the concept of the “Self,” which is the compassionate, wise, and confident leader within every individual. The therapist helps the person connect with their Self to lead the internal system.
- Healing Wounded Parts: Once the Self is engaged, the individual can begin to interact with the wounded parts with compassion and understanding. This process helps to unburden the parts from their extreme roles and heal the trauma.
- Restoring Harmony: As the parts are healed, the internal system becomes more balanced. The protective parts can relax, and the individual can experience more internal harmony and resilience.
The Benefits of IFS for CPTSD
IFS therapy can be particularly effective for individuals with CPTSD because it addresses the complex and fragmented nature of the trauma. By working with the different parts of the self, individuals can:
- Gain a deeper understanding of their internal struggles.
- Develop compassion for themselves and their experiences.
- Heal the wounded parts that carry the trauma.
- Foster a sense of internal peace and harmony.
Final Thought
Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy offers a powerful framework for understanding and addressing the multifaceted nature of trauma recovery. By connecting with the Self and healing the wounded parts, individuals can embark on a journey toward recovery and wholeness.
IFS gave me language for things I’d felt my whole life. It helped me understand why I shut down, why I overprepare, why I rehearse conversations in my head for days. These weren’t flaws. They were parts trying to protect me.
Remember, if you or someone you know is struggling with CPTSD, seeking help from a mental health professional trained in trauma therapy can be a crucial step in the healing process.
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